Saturday 21 July 2012

Drawing a line

I'm not quite sure how you draw a line and move on. Its not something I'm very good at doing and I need to learn. For me a bad day in the past has nearly always lead to a bad week. I'm having a bad week! I've been over my points for most of the week and eaten terribly. Each night I say I'm going to start afresh and go into the next day with good intentions.

I haven't eaten badly at every meal and I haven't been as bad as I could have been so I should see that a bit of a victory. However I feel guilty and I'm dreading the thought of gaining again this week. What I really need to do is get to the bottom of why I'm emotionally eating!

The first reason is I've been unwell and only just beginning to feel more like my normal self after a week. I hate not being able to help round the house or be able to look after my kids. I don't like feeling weak or out of control. As a result I have felt depressed especially in the evenings. I have been looking for comfort in food and not finding it.

The second reason is a family problem between me and my step family. Basically my step brother had a massive go at me and my husband via facebook and it turns out he's disliked us for a while now. I'm feeling feeling awful because my Mum and her Husband have ended up in the middle of all of this!

So for those reasons I've been struggling to stay on track this week and just wanted to make myself feel better with food. Its not worked of course and now I've just added the worry of gaining to my list of reasons to feel down. As much as I feel like eating rubbish it really doesn't help.

If I stay on track now for tomorrow through til Wednesday there's still a chance I could get away with staying the same or only a small gain. Its never too late to turn things around and lets face it even if I gain I'm not going to gain the full 13lbs I've lost! If I can get my head back in the right place then I'll be in a position to lose the following week and continue with my journey. So I need to see tomorrow as a brand new day of a brand new week and the first step of the rest of my weight loss journey.

I also need to remind myself that comfort eating is the reason I'm having to lose all this weight in the first place and losing weight makes me feel millions times better than food ever can. I felt on top of the world when I was doing well with my weight loss and I couldn't imagine losing that feeling. Now I've lost my motivation and struggling but weight loss success felt amazing!

So on to a new day, a fresh start and the first step back on the path to weight loss and ultimately happiness about my body.

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